Diffculty needs to jog a mile.

Recently I have been interning for the summer for the government. I have encountered MANY different people and got a real deal of working in the real world. And with all honestly, nothing changing from grade school. The workplace is still as catty as your high school cafeteria. Now you are not just working and turning in assignments BUT you are getting paid for it and living off your working experience.  As an average teenager, of course my parents and many adults surrounding me embedded in me knowledge , wisdom, and most importantly--TRUTH. But as much as they embedded it in me, I caught them in their acts. Which is somewhat odd after seeing them as a high figure in my life well besides God. Growing up and getting older, I'm noticing and appreciating more and more that I have. I can't think God enough and my parents and godmother too for all the resources but whoa..can't believe I am really getting closer to my dreams..*tune of Goapele's voice*. This summer I have got the opportunity to experience a taste of what I will be encountering in just a short year. And let me tell you---people are diffcult and nothing nice. Here I am being raised in by way of the deep, deep south. Seems like I always lived an euphoria since I came up there. I have never dealt with the criticism of where I come from especially when I lived a lot more comfortably then from here (no snob intended..but it is the truth). It is just a whole different world and a lot of hate to mention bitter. What was expected of me being a quote-on-quote "southern girl" was totally opposite than my perspective. I mean, I was just brought up to be Kagan. Nothing less, nothing more. Don't get wrong , there was growing pains and identity issues, But I am happy to who I am today. It has definitely been a wake up call to how life will bite you in the face. Truthfully, I felt invincible back home but here I felt not too much of something. Just a speck on the map. At times of this trip, I really wanted to just go home and cry to my mom because people can be so cruel. I couldn't cope with the fact that i might have to throw my southern hospitality in the dumpster for a bit just to gain "respect" or "control"...whatever! If I am going to get played and walked over because of my fabolous upbringing so be it., I have something called dignity. Never let a region or part of the world, change who you are. I will walk down any avenue of DC or New York with a smile on my face if I want to because I am glad my mom invested thousands into my braces. Sheesh! At this point, I feel like just spilling out a whole bunch of feelings. You know what I hate? When someone tries to tell me about me and my mother's relationship. Seriously!?? Ah getting a bit off topic. Or when everything you say is taken to heart and becomes offensive. But anyways, That is exactly was is so diffcult about being a kid. You can not tell anyone squat because if you do, that is your tail. And let me tell you. If I got the chance to say half what I wanted to say while I am up here, I will be on the first flight back to Houston. Diffculty. Holding your tongue. Isn't that a headache. Trust, half of what wants to spit of my mouth is not sass, just pure annoyance. I have never dealed with such bitter, annoying, and never satisfied people in my life. I wish they would do me a favor and just shut up but all on the brightside..It is just preparation. The word, "preparation".  has kept me sane this whole trip.